Monday, March 29, 2010

PastaJamFest

WPT Episode 1# MAC N CHEEZ from MY LIFE IS PASTA on Vimeo.


So, my friend Joshua has this silly pasta blog, and he decided to do a "Pasta Tour" and this was the result. It was really fun, and I think it's pretty funny. Except for the fact that it made my house smell like garlic for about 2 days. Gross. If it won't play on your computer, just go to Vimeo's site. :)

Thursday, March 25, 2010

It's Kooky

(most sincere apologies to the other 2 band members who aren't pictured)

So, it's one thing I love Thursday, and today's lovely thing is "Always Where I Need To Be" by The Kooks. This song is super catchy, and it's one that I always listen to at least twice in a row.
Unfortunately youtube has the link disabled, so you can't watch it on this site, but you can go watch it here. I'm not sure how I feel about boys in girl clothes (ok, I'm certain, I don't like it at all), but I do like the city when it's cold, beaches, and amusement parks, so clearly I love this video.

Tuesday, March 23, 2010

English major say what?

"He was a young man of about five-and-twenty, with a dark face, bronzed by exposure to the sun; he had handsome brown eyes, with a feminine smile in them, that sparkled through his black lashes, and a bushy beard and mustache that covered the whole of the lower part of his face. He was tall, powerfully built; he wore a loose grey suit, and a felt hat, thrown carelessly upon his black hair. His name was George Talboys, and he was an aft-cabin passenger on board the good ship Argus, laden with Australian wool, and sailing from Sydney to Liverpool."

Dear Dr. Woodworth, thanks for knowing the best books to let students borrow.

Dear Mary Elizabeth Braddon, you're such a great author; why did I never know you before?

Dear George Talboys, you can be my boyfriend if you want.

Saturday, March 20, 2010

Shhhh.

photo here


I'm a little heart-broken today. I have a notebook that I write absolutely everything in, and I cannot find it anywhere. It's the saddest ever. The worst part is that in this notebook was all my brainstorming for "One Thing I Love Thursday" and "Secret Saturday." ...soooo, sorry but today's secret is going to be a little lame. It will however give you more insight to my life, which is what is was all about anyways. So here we go.





After I'm done getting ready in the morning, I always smile at myself in the mirror. Twice. One serious, then one silly. And then, I avoid mirrors for the rest of the day. Granted this means that sometimes I have people going, "Oh girl, please fix your hair" a good bit, but I think avoiding mirrors actually helps my self-esteem. I can't judge what I can't see, and if the last thing I saw was me making a silly face I just remember how fun I am and how if I do whatever I do in my life with confidence (thank you Meredith aka, best roomie ever for that motto) then I can have a good day loving myself and everyone else without being worried about silly superficial things.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

half sick of shadows

It's that time again friends! This week the thing I love is...




Alfred Lord Tennyson



That's right a poet. I'm an English major, you knew it was coming. He may not be physically beautiful, but he's brilliant, and his poem"The Lady of Shalott" is one of the most captivating and beautiful works I've ever read. If you don't read this, you're only doing yourself an injustice.

The Lady of Shalott

On either side the river lie
Long fields of barley and of rye,
That clothe the wold and meet the sky;
And thro' the fields the road runs by
To many-towered Camelot;
And up and down the people go,
Gazing where the lilies blow
Round an island there below,
The island of Shalott.

Willows whiten, aspens quiver,
Little breezes dusk and shiver
Through the wave that runs for ever
By the island in the river
Flowing down to Camelot.
Four grey walls, and four grey towers,
Overlook a space of flowers,
And the silent isle imbowers
The Lady of Shalott.

By the margin, willow veil'ed,
Slide the heavy barges trail'd
By slow horses; and unhail'd
The shallop flitteth silken-sail'd
Skimming down to Camelot:
But who hath seen her wave her hand?
Or at the casement seen her stand?
Or is she known in all the land,
The Lady of Shalott?

Only reapers, reaping early,
In among the bearded barley
Hear a song that echoes cheerly
From the river winding clearly;
Down to tower'd Camelot;
And by the moon the reaper weary,
Piling sheaves in uplands airy,
Listening, whispers, "Tis the fairy
Lady of Shalott."

There she weaves by night and day
A magic web with colours gay.
She has heard a whisper say,
A curse is on her if she stay
To look down to Camelot.
She knows not what the curse may be,
And so she weaveth steadily,
And little other care hath she,
The Lady of Shalott.

And moving through a mirror clear
That hangs before her all the year,
Shadows of the world appear.
There she sees the highway near
Winding down to Camelot;
There the river eddy whirls,
And there the surly village churls,
And the red cloaks of market girls
Pass onward from Shalott.

Sometimes a troop of damsels glad,
An abbot on an ambling pad,
Sometimes a curly shepherd lad,
Or long-hair'd page in crimson clad
Goes by to tower'd Camelot;
And sometimes through the mirror blue
The knights come riding two and two.
She hath no loyal Knight and true,
The Lady of Shalott.

But in her web she still delights
To weave the mirror's magic sights,
For often through the silent nights
A funeral, with plumes and lights
And music, went to Camelot;
Or when the Moon was overhead,
Came two young lovers lately wed.
"I am half sick of shadows," said
The Lady of Shalott.

A bow-shot from her bower-eaves,
He rode between the barley sheaves,
The sun came dazzling thro' the leaves,
And flamed upon the brazen greaves
Of bold Sir Lancelot.
A red-cross knight for ever kneel'd
To a lady in his shield,
That sparkled on the yellow field,
Beside remote Shalott.

The gemmy bridle glitter'd free,
Like to some branch of stars we see
Hung in the golden Galaxy.
The bridle-bells rang merrily
As he rode down to Camelot:
And from his blazon'd baldric slung
Amighty silver bugle hung,
And as he rode his armor rung
Beside remote Shalott.

All in the blue unclouded weather
Thick-jewell'd shone the saddle-leather,
The helmet and the helmet-feather
Burn'd like one burning flame together,
As he rode down to Camelot.
As often thro' the purple night,
Below the starry clusters bright,
Some bearded meteor, burning bright,
Moves over still Shalott.

His broad clear brow in sunlight glow'd:
On burnish'd hooves his war-horse trode;
From underneath his helmet flow'd
His coal black curls as on he rode,
As he rode down to Camelot.
From the bank and from the river
He flashed into the crystal mirror,
"Tirra lirra" by the river
Sang Sir Lancelot.

She left the web, she left the loom,
She made three paces through the room,
She saw the water-lily bloom,
She saw the helmet and the plume,
She look'd down to Camelot.
Out flew the web and floated wide;
The mirror crack'd from side to side;
"The curse is upon me," cried
The Lady of Shalott.

In the stormy east-wind straining,
The pale yellow woods were waning,
The broad stream in his banks complaining.
Heavily the low sky raining
Over tower'd Camelot;
Down she came and found a boat
Beneath a willow left afloat,
And around about the prow she wrote
The Lady of Shalott.

And down the river's dim expanse
Like some bold seer in a trance,
Seeing all his own mischance—
With a glassy countenance
Did she look to Camelot.
And at the closing of the day
She loosed the chain, and down she lay;
The broad stream bore her far away,
The Lady of Shalott.

Lying, robed in snowy white
That loosely flew to left and right—
The leaves upon her falling light—
Thro' the noises of the night,
She floated down to Camelot:
And as the boat-head wound along
the willowy hills and fields among,
They heard her singing her last song,
The Lady of Shalott.

Heard a carol, mournful, holy,
Chanted loudly, chanted lowly,
Till her blood was frozen slowly,
And her eyes were darkened wholly,
Turn'd to tower'd Camelot.
For ere she reach'd upon the tide
The first house by the water-side,
Singing in her song she died,
The Lady of Shalott.

Under tower and balcony,
By garden-wall and gallery,
A gleaming shape she floated by,
Dead-pale between the houses high,
Silent into Camelot.
Out upon the wharfs they came,
Knight and Burgher, Lord and Dame,
And around the prow they read her name,
The Lady of Shalott.

Who is this? And what is here?
And in the lighted palace near
Died in the sound of royal cheer;
And they crossed themselves for fear,
All the Knights at Camelot;
But Lancelot mused a little space
He said, "She has a lovely face;
God in his mercy lend her grace,
The Lady of Shalott."


Wondering how you ever lived without it? You should be. It's so good! Plus, Look how it's inspired so many other artists to do beautiful things.
I really want to write like this. Also, I want to do a "Lady of Shalott" inspired photo shoot. Oh Tennyson, I love you.

Wednesday, March 17, 2010

My Heart


ok, so prepare for the crazy conglomeration of words that I'm about to throw together in an attempt to share. My thoughts are like ...well I'm the worst at inventing metaphors, but there's a lot of them and one thing always leads to another ("The Fixx" reference intended). I'll try to keep it concise.


One of my favorite Bible characters has always been David. I LOVE the Psalms and David, and Jonathan's friendship is one of the best things I've ever read about. Most of all though, I love that in Acts 13:22, God says "I have found David the son of Jesse, a man after my heart, who will do all My will." David messed up so bad, so many times, but he was a man after God's own heart. Tonight at church my pastor brought up the time that Nathan confronted David after he had blatantly sinned with Bathsheba then spiralled downward. Nathan (who was much better at creating metaphors and drawing parallels than I am) told David a story that enraged him at the antagonist, but when Nathan said 'David, it's you!' He repented. He cared. He was broken.


Sometimes, I am sad to say, that's not me at all. Sometimes I know that I need to change things, that I've done wrong, but I don't confess, and if I do...I don't repent, because I never turn away from it. I love Romans 12:2, "Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove that which is good and acceptable and perfect," but a lot of times I don't renew my mind; therefore, I am not transformed. I'm seeing this more clearly and with more acute pain now that Kimberly and I have started going through Disciplines of a Godly Woman again. I know I need to be more intentional and disciplined. I want to change things and make my life an offering to the Lord, but knowing and doing are not the same. I want to be a [wo]man after God's heart, but really I'm after Jenna's heart. And Jeremiah 17:9 says, "The heart is more deceitful than all else And is desperately sick; Who can understand it?"


So here we are. I'm trying to overcome, and I know that I can because I've realized, like David did, "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; A broken and contrite heart, O God, you will not despise." I'd appreciate prayers. That God would change me, because clearly I can't, that He would be glorified through me, and that I would be able to live in these verses:


James:4:8-10

Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.

Be miserable and mourn and weep; let your laughter be turned into mourning and your joy to gloom.

Humble yourselves in the presence of the Lord, and He will exalt you.

Tuesday, March 16, 2010

my life as jenna

So it's "Spring Break" here in my life, and as you [hopefully] have discerned, Spring Break is in quotation marks. This is because I don't consider what is happening this week a break at all. Here's what my "break" is looking like.

  • Work all day every day this week. walking about 4 miles worth of circles all day long. and paper cuts. my feet hurt.
  • Schoolwork...at some point. a couple hundred pages of literature. one big paper. one little paper.
  • Working out. (in case you weren't aware, plyometrics is all kinds of death, and if my body didn't have the same consistency as cottage cheese, I would never ever attempt them. However, it is at this point in my life absolutely necessary)



I don't want this whole post to be depressing though so I think I'll share what I would do if I could do whatever I wanted.


Go visit Allison. and Andrea. and Sarah.







Shop in Miami.



Lay on the beach in Brazil.

I've been to the Copacabana before, see:

Clearly these are lofty dreams, and that's probably why I'm here working instead, but it's okay. Tonight I'm going to get Chinese with my mom and watch Shakespeare for school. I'm so cool. A post with more substance tomorrow most likely, and then One Thing I Love Thursday!

Saturday, March 13, 2010

The Premier of Secret Saturday

If you guys are going to be faithful (and crazy) enough to read my ramblings, I've decided that I owe it to you to be more personal. Sometimes I share with you what God's doing in my life, and sometimes I share silly things that I think, but I think there needs to be a constant. And one that's somewhere in the middle; Secret Saturday is my attempt at such. Each week I will tell you something personal about me that you probably don't know. Some weeks will be juicer than others, some more obvious, but I'm sure I will often risk embarassment. Good news is, I love you enough not to care :) [sidenote: since the embarassing thing isn't a joke, I'll probably only remind you this first Sat. Every other one you'll have to remember to check or miss out.] So yeah. Let's get this started shall we?


Secret One: Sometimes I wish I had a twin.


This has been a thing for me ever since I saw "The Parent Trap" back in the day. I really believed for at least a year there was a 70% chance my dad was part of a cover-up conspiracy and my real dad and twin sister lived somewhere else. (I think the whole experience may have done a little psychological damage, but I can't prove anything.) I also kind of think the only reason I stopped thinking that was because the theory was based on a movie, and my mom an I were absolutely not as posh as the mom/daughter in said movie. (Completely aware of the extent of my ridiculousness) This experience also helped foster a mild obsession with the Olsen twins (I can feel you judging as I type). So here's what my life would look like if I had a twin.



We would take cute pictures together like this:
We would be rockstars with messy hair and big glasses like this:

We would wear fabulous dresses for artsy pictures like this:

And we would have amazing tastes in fashion like here:

We would also clearly have to have different hair color so we wouldn't confuse people, and we would go to class for each other (wearing hats to cover the hair) so we'd never miss anything. I would always have someone to ask "I can wear my hair like this?" and "Is this too much?" And I'd never have to talk to myself. ...now that I think about it, having a twin might be too much Jenna. I'm not sure the world can handle two of me.

Even still, sometimes I wish I had a twin.

Thursday, March 11, 2010

:One Thing I Love Thursday:

Here in Jenna Land, we are all about trying new things. In honor of this tradition I will now be having "One Thing I Love Thursday" (hence the clever title). This Thursday I choose Zooey Deschanel.



I Love how sweet she is.


I Loved her in this movie...

And I loved her in this movie.
I Love her in this fabulous band.
And I LOVE absolutely everything she wears.


I love that she's so beautiful, but she can be adorably cute too. I love that she tries new things, can pull off pretty much any fashion item ever and that she sounds heavenly.

Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Dramatic Monolgue, Please

So here's where I am in my life. First of all, I made a "b" on both my close-reading paper and midterm for Shakespeare which is an amazing feat. (at all and for the first time taking The Woman, The Legend, Dr. Willis) I've been hearing the angel chorus all night. And it is at this point I would like to launch into my dramatic monologue (Shakespeare, not the angel chorus).

We are currently reading King Lear and it is one of the most depressing things ever. Granted I kind of needed it after Othello which I read, loved, and adored the most villainous and evil character ever (the complexity of his character is fascinating) then questioned my sanity/humanity. I feel better about this play because I despise the villain, but it's so tragic, it breaks my heart. Anyways, in this play, one character (Gloucester) is tricked into turning against his son (Edgar). Edgar is forced to run away to avoid death, but shortly after, Gloucester runs into him, and doesn't recognize him. You see, Edgar is now dressed as a beggar. He does this under the pretense that as a society, we overlook the wounded, the poor, the deranged. And he assumes rightly because his father never once even connects him to his son; he doesn't look at him close enough. In fact he over-looks him. I think we do this a lot.

[Aside] We over-look the needy. As my professor mused, if we see a homeless person on the street would we recognize them at the mall, in regular clothes? No. In fact, if we see someone at the mall, most of us wouldn't recognize them at the movies later. We just don't pay attention to each other.

So shortly after meeting the beggar, Gloucester is turned against in the palace. As the mutiny ensues, both of his eyes are gouged out, and he too is sent out onto the heath to wander. Now here's where I had my epiphany. Edgar sees his eyeless father and guides and protects him while pretending to be a beggar. And eventually Gloucester recognizes him as his son. BUT, it's only after he loses his eye site that he sees his son. Are we like that? First, do we even look? Second, do we see?

Somehow this led me down the path of wondering how often I don't see others. I wonder too why it's so easy for most to recite the Gospel than to share or live it. It's sad, and please don't think I'm getting blinded by the log in my eye trying to see the speck in others'...I'm not, I promise. It's actually the log in my eye that's convicting. Earlier I was thinking about people who are spiritually condescending, and it honestly depressed me a little, but God knows me too well and humbled me in Shakespeare. I'm guilty of the very thing that was breaking my heart; how can I even add others into the equation? (Not that this is an equation...Jenna! no math metaphors!) I don't know how far I've now drifted from my original topic, and I'm sure by now I've confused most, but reading King Lear really impacted me. I hope that I can leave this play behind having become more perceptive to those around me and how I relate to them. I want to see while I still have my eyes, and I want to serve while there are still people who need me.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

an attempt to provoke thought

'It is but a few hours, sir,' Clenham cheerfully urged upon him.

'A few hours, sir,' he returned in a sudden passion. 'You talk very easily of hours, sir! How long do you suppose, sir, that an hour is to a man who is choking for want of air?'
picture from ffffound.com
quote from Charles Dickens' "Little Dorrit"
If you're looking for some reading material that beautifully entertwines characters and themes in an exciting plot with eloquently styled writing, Look no further.

Saturday, March 6, 2010

Go ahead be gone with it

Be ye forewarned, this will not be worth your time in any way imaginable. Sorry Boutcha. I just thought, I have some time to kill, and I feel like talking...without actually talking, so really I guess I just feel like sharing. These are things I love in this moment.I wish Tim Burton was my friend. Alice was so good.

I love her so much. So pretty and sweet.


I never get tired of these on my nails.


One day I might make my bridesmaids wear this ^
or that ^ either of which will keep me laughing for years.


When I finally get time to sew, I'm going to make something like this.

And finally, we took our fair share of awkward family photos over the summer (see following), but the last guys take the cake. This was for real a chairmen of the board official portrait. It makes me die always. Sometimes when I'm having a bad day I'll pull it up to laugh.

If you're super confused/questioning my sanity I understand. There was no rhyme or reason to this post other than to let you in my head for a minute. I won't be offended if you don't like it there, it's an acquired taste. And on that note, I'm going to start a new (maybe once a week) endeavor where I will try to tell you at least one secret about me. It could be fun. It could be traumatizing. Excited yet?

Monday, March 1, 2010

Ides of March


First blog of March, and I think it's time for a life update! A lot of stuff has been happening in my life and things have been changing, but at the same time it seems like nothing is happening and life is moving in slow motion. I've really just been trying hard to balance all my emotions and desires and actions with each other and seek God while doing so; it's been a challenge. So, to make this less painful for you, the reader, I'll divide this blog into sections.


1.Emotions.

I really want to make a pie chart here. If I find that it's possible, it's totally happening. (Look for it in blogs to come.)


B.Desires.


Since I have been so blessed to be a bridesmaid many times over, my sister is going to be so blessed to receive those dresses, instead of having to buy new ones. That being said, the dresses need a little work so that they look more prom trendy than bridesmaid chic. I'm pretty excited about expanding my sewing skills through this larger endeavor, but I have to make time. I've got one dress pinned up and planned out, but no sewing has been started; I also have a Christmas present (don't judge) to finish sewing and mail too. I want to work on this every second of every day. Sewing is such a release for me.


I am also extremely desirous of starting a painting project for one of my favorite professors. Pretty sure that won't get underway until Spring Break though because it's going to be thought and labor intensive (pictures will come when I finish). Get excited.


I want to go to the beach soooo badly right now. Alas, my spring break will not be spent on the sand, but in a germy Dr.'s office. Blek.


And lastly, I want to road trip to see people I love and miss dearly. There's a whole heap of them though, and I'm sad to report that this desire is most likely the one that will be neglected. (Until post May 15, because as of today, there will be an "exclusive friend group" [at least in part] reunion in FL)


3.Actions.

I have almost finished writing my research paper due Wednesday.

I have thought about writing my midterm due Wednesday.

I have completely ignored studying for my midterm Thursday.


And then the Actions that don't make me want to roll my eyes and gag:


I bought animal crackers.

and

Today I faxed my application for an internship at a church in Nashville. It would be for a whole year, beginning in August, and I'm so excited at the prospect. Getting this internship would be step one of my journey to being a grown-up [ish] and that's pretty cool. However, as excited as I may be, I'm so nervous I could throw up. Trust me, I know God is in control, and He's going to see me through, I just get self-concious when I feel like people are going to be evaluating my worth, and that's exactly what this feels like. I can convey my thoughts about literature all day long, but when I talk about myself, I think I sound dumb. It's okay though because if that's where God wants me, they'll love my awkwardness, and if it isn't then I don't want to be there. I'm channeling some serious Esther right now; "If I perish, I perish." I'm going to live and do what God calls me to knowing that if He desires me to do something, He's going to make sure it happens. So comforting.


I'm sure I'll post more about Esther later this week. I've been reading her and Friday some of the college and career girls from my church got together and talked about her a little. God's using this story in my life in a big way right now, but if you just can't wait to hear about it, read this blog to get a preview (Besides that, she's just encouraging and uplifting to read). Meanwhile, I'd love to hear about your life right now. What's happening?
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