happy thanksgiving.

feel guilty, carnivores?

You know how when you gather with any group of people around Thanksgiving, everyone always wants to go around and say what it is they're thankful for? Well I'm not thankful for that tradition and here's why:

pressure, panic, and pretentiousness.

You immediately know that what you say has to be sitting comfortably between "gracious and contemplative" and "light-hearted and entertaining," and if what you say doesn't fit in with whatever the theme is at your event, then brace yourself for the hurrumphs and eye-rollings because they'll shoot straight over that green bean casserole and into your heart.

But for the sake of the argument, let's say you are blessed enough to find yourself at the end of the thankful train; you may have realized what kind of thing you need to say, but you still have to think of what you're going to say. I am so bad at thinking of things on the spot, and being on the spot makes me so nervous that I also usually forget whatever it is that I thought of ahead of time to avoid the blank panic, and then there I am, panicking anyways.

And of course anything that comes to mind is going to end up being pretentious sounding when there is so much injustice and hurt in the world. Don't get me wrong, I love (LOVE) Thanksgiving, but I wish that when this sort of thing happened, there were categories.

It should be which member of the Beatles are you most thankful for, or what type of cereal, or whose contribution to classic literature. Narrow it down people; I need boundaries to function!

All of that being said, I am going to tell you some things that I am thankful for, because you didn't ask me at all on the spot and because you'll understand that I have an awful memory couldn't possibly fit everything I'm thankful for in one post. (for real, this is not by any means comprehensive and is mostly just for entertainment.)

i wanted to  live in this show.

1. Gilmore Girls. this show taught me about the great power that obscure references has, helped me cultivate my speed-hearing...and talking skills, and demonstrated to me how to be witty and charming; clearly this show is gold.

2. Eyelashes. Sometimes a piece of dust gets in my eye and it makes me want to cry (hey I rhymed!) and then I think about how without eyelashes, dust would get in my eyes all day long every day and I would cry forever and that would be awful; plus I'd look so weird.

3. Tissues. maybe you've never wondered, but as someone whose allergies crippled them at least 4/12 months a year during her childhood, I have often wondered how people felt about their runny noses and their non-disposable 'tissues'. eek; handkerchiefs are the most disgusting.

pretty sure these weren't the thinkers. sorry boutcha feminism.

4. The Victorian Era. these people were thinkers, arguers, make sense of the world-ers. their world was crazy and smelly and weird, but they did what they could with what they had and I am glad they did, thankful for them if you will.

Obscure things aside, I'm really thankful that I have such a supportive family. I have had friends whose parents have told them that they need to be serious and give up on the career they chose going into college, but I went into college undecided then chose English because I loved it and I was good at it, and my mom just said, "you know, it doesn't really matter. You love it, and God will use you no matter what you've chosen." And now I've got several friends who are each very interested in missions and traveling and their parents are adamantly against it. The parents of these friends have either expressed their disdain outright, or they just aren't encouraging or optimistic about it. My family tells me all the time that they're proud of me and would miss me, but want me to go. And while I have friends upset about being single, or even enduring their parent's comments about their "love life" mine understand me and my desires and...well they're just awesome.

I also have amazing friends. Not only are they all way talented, but I get unique insight from each of them. Most of my friends I have known since junior high. They've seen me learn and grow and be ugly and cry and still they love me; it always amazes me that they still love me. And then there are friends that I've spent a mere 3 months during a summer with who mean just as much to me as my childhood friends, people who love me and love the Lord and have such big servants' hearts. I'm so blessed, I can even call the people I work with friends. They're funny and loud and so, so very smart and they'd do anything for me. ohhhilovethemsomuch!

And mostly I'm just thankful for Christ. I mean without the Holy Spirit, I wouldn't even be able to be thankful. I can't imagine how terrible of a person I'd be if I weren't a Christian, but because of Jesus, I don't have to wonder. Not saying I'm a good person now, but I am grateful and that is because of Him.I could go on for a while here, but I think I'll stop there.

Happy Thanksgiving friends.