Sunday, December 16, 2007

Christmas "Vacation" Day One

Since thinking is something I enjoy, I decided maybe I should share my thoughts with others and share the joy. Well that and a whole lot of boredom. If you don't get joy from reading this, well sorry I can only do what I can do. (Profound I know. :P &ilu.

So this is it. Those 2 words that more often than not strike fear into the hearts of people everywhere: “Family Vacation”. Separately they’re fine. Family, Oh sure we love ‘em.. Vacation, we’re on it, but together? Now that’s trouble. Last night I was very dismayed to find out we would be Leaving at 5:00 AM. Not getting up, not loading up, but leaving. Holy Cow. So I set my trusty phone alarm (which to my professors’ joys has never failed me) It went off as planned at 4:30 (although I woke up just fine on my own at 3:15) and to my surprise I was the only one awake. Are you kidding me?! I have never seen my family get ready in such short an amount of time. Usually I spend Sunday mornings trying to hurry Katie and Jacob along so that I can be on time for church, (may I add not once has it ever worked). So here we are all SEVEN of us in our rental Bus (ok ok it’s actually a van, but seriously nerdy. I’m thankful I promise :P) And the time is 5:03. whoa. The sun isn’t even up! Amazingly enough, no one is in a foul mood. Not even me! I know right? We’re ready to roll, only.. the seatbelts are gay. They’re behind and over and backwards and cross-ways from the seat they go with. Not even kidding we used like 4 of us and almost 30 minutes to figure them out, and mine is still hooked into the middle seat. It was almost hysterical. The time is now 5:30, and we’re leaving. YAY! I’m going to sleep now. Wait a minute, why aren’t we moving? *open my eyes* we’re at the house?! Mom forgot her phone charger. This my friends is a sign of things to come. It’s 9:35 our time and we’ve already hit 2 convenient stores, McDonald’s, and had 2 bathroom breaks. I’m going to scream. Cock Pit: Dad, yeah let’s just say I’m glad I took Dramamine. Mom, if you know her, I need not say anything else on the subject. Back row: Marty, he’s got a headset turned up so loud I’m surprised you haven’t heard it yet. (Side note, mom’s yelling now.. and she’s done) and he’s sharing the seat with Jacob: he’s actually been quiet so far, except when he borrowed Katie’s Ipod and she wanted back but “no I’ve only had it an hour and a half” “ We’ve been driving two hours” “Katie no we haven’t we’re in Ozark “Jacob give it to me” ..You get the picture. Middle Row: Katie and Katie. Yeah that’s right a whole row to herself, well if you don’t count her luggage next to her. Other than the fact that’s she’s reading over my shoulder, she’s not doing too bad. Then there’s the front row (now you see why I said Bus) Myself, and Aunt Debbie. I’m not sure if you know me or not but my legs are long and the space in front of my seat is not. I’m squished but surviving. Aunt Debbie like myself has a love for music so when conserving our Ipods’ batteries, she would like the radio to be on something enjoyable, since Mom controls that, music we could have a problem later. I have only heard “are we almost there” 3 times, and “Where are we” maybe 4, so 3 coloring pages, 2 -30 minute naps, half a Collected Works of Edgar Allen Poe book, and one-fourth an Ipod battery considered, I’d say I’m not doing too bad. Just Pray. That’s all I can say. ;)
Time has elapsed. We are here, well technically. But still not to our timeshare. It is 2:13 our time. 3:13 theirs or maybe ours for the week, whatever. You haven’t really missed much. Lunch : Taco Bell and let me tell you I didn’t know it was possible to ruin chicken quesadillas, but my chicken was burnt, and I think the girl tried to spell her name with the slicer. I watched 2 movies, the second of which just ended and I’m wishing it had lasted a little longer. Dad: Playing a mixture of Mariachi band music and Spanish Talk Radio. Mom: DRIVING!! And alternating between hitting the gas as if she’s qualifying for the Indy 500 and swerving from side to side of the lane as if trying to miss the invisible squirrels in the road. CAN I PLEASE HAVE MORE DRAMAMINE AND A SPRITE?! Katie still trying to look over my shoulder, I’m getting paranoid. Aunt Debbie listening to my ipod and doing dances that died a long time ago. And every now and then a random “Jacob shut-up” and “MARTY.. MARTY.. quit singing so loud!!!” “ Put your seatbelt back on!”. “Tim just read what Mapquest wrote, no that is not a slight right, that’s a sharp right”. Someone please let me out now. I’m telling you I can walk. OHH MY GOODNESS, we’re here. I just want to get out of the car before I barf or scream or do something crazy. If you know my family, you feel my pain. Breaking news: : : Someone just broke something, and it wasn’t anything tangible, we have 2 more people than we’re supposed to have for our room occupancy, and my brother is laying in the floor, hiding in case “they want to count” while mom looks out all the windows in case someone comes to verify our number of people and Aunt Debbie is trying to create her own gas mask. Ohh My.


Leslie :) said...

Jenna, you seriously have a talent to entertain someone! Sounds like you're at the beginnings of having a "Griswold's Christmas Vacation" to me, lol!

Clay said...

Jenna, that was a very entertaining read. I am looking forward to future installments of your vacation writings!

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